Sometimes, I, the great pretender,
In the mirror, late at night,
Think about the quirks of gender,
Question wrong and question right.
The reversed Shania Twain,
‘Cause, women, I feel like a man.
Sometimes, I, the unmarried thing,
Siegfried’s daughter, Bilbo’s niece,
Feel the itch to wear a ring,
In a bus to sleep in peace,
In a train myself to hide,
Let them know I’m occupied.
Sometimes, I, the fake coquette,
Don’t know what I’m meant to be,
Judith or Marie Antoinette?
Would you lose your head for me?
Just remember I’m like Henry,
Would you be the fifth I’ll marry?
Sometimes, I, the worst performer,
Wear a shirt or cut my hair,
I’m the one who’s wearing trousers,
I’m the one who I most dare.
Surely not a Sleeping Beauty,
Ready to perform my duty.
Sometimes, I, Jay Butler’s child,
Think “No one will put me down.”
Just like Oscar, I go wild,
Wear makeup cause I’m a clown,
Do my task, my quest, my deed
If you prick me I will not bleed.
Sometimes, I, the childless witch,
Blot some paper in my den,
Some may call me a barking bitch
’Cause too freely I use my pen.
Fruitless job that makes me blind?
Well, it helps me clear my mind.
Sometimes, I, the moody loner,
like to take a stroll at night.
Does my strut give you a boner?
Do you want to start a fight?
Won’t be a dolly on your shelf.
My advice? Just blame yourself.
Sometimes, I, bride-not-to-be,
Look for ways to fill my void.
Need a man or a PhD?
Neither stick with Sigmund Freud.
My brain and body are fully grown,
I need some room that’s of my own.
Sometimes, I, lioness or lion?
Wonder ‘bout what I mistook.
If mine’s the only shirt I’ll iron
And mine’s the only meal I’ll cook,
Am I lonely or simply free?
Answer clearly, I pray thee.
Sometimes, I, the one with wages,
Pay the whole or split the bill.
Don’t care if it’s taken ages
To know I too have free will.
I’ll prove you wrong: I am much more
Than your nun, your wife, your whore.
Carmen Rachele Fucile holds a BA and MA in Languages from the University of Calabria; she has been working as a French-language teacher since 2022. Her interests include creative writing, linguistics, literature, and translation.
